Corbyn's biggest enemy will never be defeated

The populist movement led by Jeremy Corbyn likes nothing better than to be besieged by enemies. The ‘neoliberal’ Blairite MPs who will do whatever they can to obstruct socialism. The so-called ‘Israeli lobby’, which apparently trumps up charges of anti-semitism against the left. And, of course, the notorious ‘MSM’ – proper newspapers to you and me – responsible for issuing a poisonous drip-feed of lies and distortions about the motivations and intentions of the Dear Leader.

Traditionally, opprobrium was reserved for the ‘right-wing press’, but recently things have taken a comical turn with the Jez junkies turning on The Guardian. Despite the liberal paper being the repository of correspondence from every leftist luminary since the beginning of time, its open-minded and critical stance is now anathema to the hard-left activists busily destroying the Labour Party.

Corbyn himself harbours bizarre fantasies of ‘democratising’ the press, as if objective reporting can only come about through the collective decisions of NUJ chapels.

Maybe that’s how news works in Caracas, Jez, my old son. But not in Camden Town or Canary Wharf. People will continue to report on your antics whether you like it or not. And they won’t be putting their latest scoop in front of a People’s Committee for approval.

It’s just one example of where Corbyn and his supporters are confronted by their true enemy.

It’s an inconvenient and doughty foe called reality.

Laura Smith MP said last week that if the government didn’t call a general election, there should be a general strike. A stirring call to warm the hearts of Momentum activists. 

But there are a couple of problems. 

Most people in the UK are not members of trade unions. And last year, only 33,000 people were involved in labour disputes, which was actually the lowest figure since 1893.

Time for a reality check. There will be no general strike, because people don’t actually go on strike.

At last week’s conference, the party prioritised a discussion of Palestine. Although they did a reasonable job at keeping overt anti-semitic commentary off the podium, it was decided that delegates would be allowed to wave Palestinian flags.

This was classic Corbynism – a one-sided view of a complex international dispute under the pretext of promoting peace and justice. (Remember how Jez single-handedly brought the warring factions in Northern Ireland together by only talking to one side?)

No doubt activists felt proud of their display of solidarity. They cheered raucously when Corbyn declared that his future government would recognise Palestine from day one.

But out there in the real world? People know little about the Middle East and are bemused to see the Party obsess over it. If the public is conscious of any major conflict, it’s Syria, because of the tragic deaths of over half a million people over the past seven years. But hell would freeze over before the Corbynite leadership led a denunciation of Assad and Putin.

Workers’ presses? General strikes? Palestinian flag-waving? All thoroughly embarrassing and pretty revealing. But cynics will say largely unimportant. 

What about the big issues? Hasn’t Labour captured the Zeitgeist there?

How about defence and security, then?

John McDonnell was quizzed by Piers Morgan on whether Labour would be prepared to use nuclear weapons. Whatever your own views on the issue – and there are legitimate arguments on both sides – his answer was as far away from sanity and reality as anything uttered by a British politician in the modern era. He said, apparently without irony, that any use of our nuclear arsenal would follow community consultation.

That’s right. While the Russians or some other enemy rained missiles down on us, John would be asking Momentum to organise a consultation meeting in the Hayes and Harlington Community Centre.

But the Shadow Chancellor is just as detached from reality when it comes to his economic brief. His announcement that companies with over 250 employees will have to set aside a fund and pay dividends to their workers was pretty well received. Free money always is. In snap polling, even a small majority of Tories backed the idea.

Just imagine this policy in the real world though.

Companies with 249 workers might well choose not to expand. Other bigger businesses might choose to relocate. And if the impact of the dividend policy didn’t prompt such dramatic decisions, it might well have an insidious effect over time. Firms might offer less generous benefits to workers. Or reduce pension contributions. Or be reluctant to raise wages.

It’s frustrating and more than a little depressing, but this is the very stuff of government. The need to think beyond rhetoric and find ways to engage with business. Taking a reality check. But that’s just not the way of the hard left.

And where do we need the biggest reality check of all?

Brexit, of course.

Corbyn shouts in his speech that if May can’t negotiate the UK’s withdrawal from the European Union, she should stand aside and let him have a go.  But the public don’t want that.  Polls show that although they have little confidence in the Prime Minister’s ability to negotiate a good deal, they have less confidence in the Labour Leader.

What do Labour offer exactly? Their six tests require that Brexit delivers the ‘exact same benefits’ that our current membership of the single market and customs union afford us. This is something that EU cannot concede in the real world and, in fact, demands more concessions from the European bureaucrats than May’s much-criticised Chequers plan.

It’s all bluster. And for as long as Labour remains in opposition, it matters little. In the turmoil of the British politics right now though, can we really discount the possibility of Corbyn assuming power? That’s when farce would turn quickly to tragedy.